I got a message on my inbox yesterday morning and this was the very question; “why do married men cheat?” this question has been swirling around for so long and its prominence is a source of concern for many.

The truth is, this question is not a misery, and we all know it. As a girl, your parents, uncles and aunties told you even before you get married. “Man dey like woman ooo, even if he dey carry girl for outside, happy say he nor dey bring am come house” this is what you will be told.

It has been implanted into our subconscious to accept this and be grateful for it, and not to ask questions or be upset.

As a young girl, if your boyfriend cheats on you and you break up with him, even your girlfriends will call you a fool. They say, “babe, u nor jus get sense ooo nor be e get money to waste, chop am”

It’s what guys do, and so in the African society, ladies are taught to expect it “all men cheat” they say “you can’t leave a country because of rain” they say.

I asked a married friend of mine this very question of why men cheat and this was what he said “you might not just get the urge for sex with your wife, but with another girl outside, you do. And also, you always know that your wife will always be there, and you are tired of the setting”

Sounds like a reasonable answer right? What about your wife? If she wasn’t a virgin before she married you, then she must have had other sexual partners, do you ever consider that you might bore her too and she must be tired of it with you as well?

In our society it’s okay for men to cheat and that’s why they do with no remorse whatsoever. It’s not a problem; in fact the problem will be when he doesn’t cheat.

Everyone comes up with different excuses why married men cheats “the wife is lazy and dirty, young girls wear seductive clothes, human needs are insatiable, because their wives don’t provide sexual satisfaction, because they are tired of eating one kind of soup, because men are born to cheat” these all boils down to one point. Men cheat because the society allows it.

Do you think that some married women don’t cheat? Of course they do, but they hide it and can’t flaunt it in their husband’s face because her church women’s group will ex-communicate her, her mother will be disappointed in her and the entire society will never forgive her.

Why do some married men cheat? Because we all allow it, because we think it’s perfectly mundane and because he can.

As a girl, a man asks you out and you see a wedding ring on his finger and you don’t cringe, you accept him. As a woman, your husband is sleeping with the neighbour’s daughter and you go fight the young girl instead of your promiscuous husband.

You wonder why married people cheats, well, it’s because they are not committed to one another, something starts going wrong in your marriage and you seek for comfort outside your home instead of fixing the problem and finding a Godly way out.

Maybe there is another secret out there that I don’t know about, maybe there is a more understandable reason why married men and women cheats. And feel free to give us more insight to it on the comment section.

But here is a piece of my mind, men cheats because the society forbids women from cheating and encourages men to…


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25 thoughts on “WHY DO MARRIED MEN CHEAT?

  1. The reason why men cheat still depends on all of us in the society, the wives,the young ladies out there wearing skimpy clothes and the men who have refused to be focus on their goal on life.

  2. You’re very right my dear. The society gives men the upper hand to do whatever they like and we women have to accommodate them. May God help us all

  3. God bless u for having the boldness to venture into this topic that a lot of people shy away from. U are a blessing

  4. The irony of the Society’s approach to the matter of infidelity in marriage is truly alarming and it’s all our responsibility to rectify it. Good one Tasha. Ur writing style is unique and it shows your heart of gold.

  5. Mrs. Fidelis says:

    It starts with the mothers, when their female kids gets different male visits, the mothers call the girls to caution but when the male children starts moving around with different girls and even bringing them home, the mothers don’t bother chastising them because boys don’t get pregnant and they think no damage is done to the boys but this is how the society gets filled with men who have no moral understanding of cheating. We all have to help correct this. Miss Eruteya, welldone.

  6. Excuses of them tired of eating one kind of soup is not it. Some will say the wife is not packaged, not sexually attracted or active. Why don’t u make her who n what u want her to be. Make her her to ur taste n stop those sleazy n slimy excuses. Though, not all men cheat but majority do cheat. It can only take the grace of God to meet a man that is faithful to the wife. Like the saying “sew ur clothes according to ur size”. Pimp ur wife and make her be the choice u desire. Some women also add n course to the reason their Men cheat. The nagging wife,coquette or pert can make the Man cheat. When there’s no happiness in the house he will surely go out to cool his nerves and this gives room to meeting other women that are generous or pretend to. My dear friends, pls try and know ur partner in some ways before rushing into marriage. Correct each other when found guilty of any offence. Involve in courtship before marriage. Thanks Dear Tasha for ur wonderful words on this post.

  7. I think it’s because of the traditional marriage custom, if the marriage is a court marriage a man will not want to do anything to offend his wife because he knows that she will divorce him and take half his money. Men value their money and don’t want to lose it at all. It’s also the reason why men don’t want court marriages because they want the freedom to do whatever they like. We have the power because our tradition gives it to is.

  8. Marriad woman cheating on their husband is very rare nd mostly d men are d cause, many people go into marriage bcos they think they are due for marriage, nd due to pressure from parents nd society they decided to get marriad. Thinking every other tin will come after d marriage, it is there in marriage dey will come to kno their differences, most cases d man no longer find d woman attractive, even wen d woman is trying all her best to keep d marriage , my advice is Dat marriage should not b due to pressure or pity, marriage should b build on d fear of d lord nd true luv nd affection

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